Dr. Hawkins a well-known spiritual teacher and psychiatrist developed a Map of Consciousness. The map shows the vibrational energy of different emotional states. When you look at it, you could see that love has a high vibrational frequency of 500. And in order to access the states of higher consciousness, you must be in the energy frequency of love and above.
According to another research done by Richard J Davidson, compassion is a trainable skill. People who practice compassion have a more positive outlook on life and are less likely to become stressed. It was also found that people who practice self-compassion could slow the process of ageing. Practising compassion can also enhance your emotional intelligence skills. Emotional intelligence is extremely beneficial for building relationships and coping with the challenges of life in general. In order to be a kind-hearted and compassionate person, you must be kind and compassionate towards yourself. Just as the old saying goes - 'An empty jug will fill no glasses'.
The Power of Self-Compassion
Do you remember the time when you first started walking (maybe you don’t – but you get the zest), everyone around was so encouraging, some even clapped and even when you fell down you heard phrases like, “brave boy/girl”, “well done”, “try again” etc. And you tried ….. again and again till you got it. Even little things like holding a spoon and drawing a straight line were celebrated. Fast forward a few decades later, you run companies, manage families, and get up and try every day, but who is celebrating for all you do? who is encouraging? Do you ever hear words like ‘try again’, ‘brave boy/girl' etc? Half of the time no one, but only we know how hard we are trying or what we have been through. Self-compassion, therefore, becomes your duty to yourself. Appreciate what you have done, and what you are doing, and ignore the small mistakes you make along the way, as we are all just learning ‘to live'.
We learn in people development courses - how to avoid negative feedback for staff motivation. How about we stop giving negative feedback to ourselves for our motivation? Self-compassion brings an immediate feeling of peace and happiness. Think about it this way, if you had a friend who you could not get rid of, but the person is constantly nagging and trying to find problems in you. What effect will this person have on you? Now think about what you are doing to yourself when you are self-criticizing. According to Marisa Peer (one of the UK’s famous mental health coaches), ‘the most effective way to boost your self-esteem is self-praise’. Marisa has coached many successful millionaires and billionaires, and one of the healing exercises Marisa asks her mentees to do is, to write a simple note on their mirror, which reads – ‘I AM ENOUGH’. This simple note has brought drastic changes to the life of many individuals which just shows the power of self-compassion.
Below are a few ways you can practice self-compassion:
Pay Attention to your self-talk: Notice how you talk to yourself, particularly at difficult times or after making a mistake. Instead of saying ‘I am so stupid’ chose to say, ‘I made a mistake but it's OK and I am learning.’
Appreciate and Praise yourself often: Now I know that we live in a society where modesty is considered admirable. However, when you are talking to yourself no one else is listening. So, next time you do something nice, I give you the freedom to praise yourself, clap for yourself, and celebrate your smallest achievements.
Practice Gratitude: Every morning and just before going to bed, list at least five things that are good about you and be grateful for them.
Remember everyone you know will play a long or short role in your life, but the person you see in the mirror will live it all with you. So be nice.
This blog is posted by Anurag Rai. Anurag is the Founder of Superhuman In You and Superhuman University. He is also the founder of multiple other businesses and a certified NLP & meditation practitioner.
Other articles you may find interesting: